Where's Waldo

Have you ever thought about what you would do if you met the perfect mate, and then they had the strangest name? Not really Waldo, but kinda like that. Like Allowicious. Or if you married a guy with an extremely strange last name....like Mohatsingrets, or Beefsausagesinski? Or what if you got married and find out your spouse has like explosive booger disorder, or their body shakes when they go to sleep? What if they sleep with their eyes all the way open? Or what if their hands sweat a lot, and then everytime he touches your hair you need ur hair done again? What if everytime you were about to kiss your spouse they began rolling on the floor and giggling uncontrollably? Or, if every time you were to engage in some relations, the inside of their nose started itching, and they began to dig up their nose? Or what if their elbows were constantly ashy?

These are all things that make me go hmmmmmmm. . . . somebody help me.